I am very tired lately

The best way to win an argument is not to have one. We don’t earn a big trophy saying we won an argument and I am really interested in knowing how many times in internet history someone had a huge argument with people they didn’t know and at the end they said “You are right” and acknowledged their defeat. I bet the percentage is very small. The thing is that I know; I know people who loves to be rude or say something just for the sake of sounding smart will never agree with whatever the hell you are trying to prove. I know that. I know that often times they will end up taking the argument to a different direction or talk about how you look, talk about how funny your name is, talk about your religion, nationality. I mean, I did study the fallacies of argument, but someone who clearly picks out a thing just to be nasty doesn’t care about that. I thought this break would be wonderful. I would sink into my bed and read all the books that I have acquired (I counted, I have yet to read 23 books that’s currently in my bedroom)

I ended up being on social media most of the time. I found myself crying over the refugee stories posted on Humans Of New York and strangely found myself arguing over people who thinks Muslims are terrorists or how bad the religion is. The thing is I am not a super religious person and I am not going to claim myself to be a 100% pure Muslim. But what I do know is that there are different measure of extreme in this religion. According to my family and a 80% of Muslim population that I know a religious person would be modest, they would not raise their voice, they will be lovable, they will not gossip, they will say prayers, they will cover themselves properly and so on. While I agree the Muslim dominant countries are very corrupted I also would like to point out that “religion” is the most effective weapon of all. Government in those countries knows the easiest way to take control over people is the fear of going to hell. Prestige and respect is a huge thing in Islam and the Islamic rulers takes advantage of it (Not just Islam though, many religious leaders). I remember my dad arguing with one of his childhood friends on our dining table over Bangladesh government. Bangladesh is corrupted. The uncle (My dad’s childhood friend, I called him uncle) said “well the Islamic party should have taken control over it” and my dad replied, “You mean, the people who killed and raped thousands of people, helped Pakistani army to kill Bengali soldier during the independence war?” Uncle replied, “we would be much better off if we were part of Pakistan”

I could tell you all about what is wrong with his argument, but what is important is that he is blinded by the religious accessories they put on top of government. The person running for Islamic party had a slogan that said “if you want tickets for heaven, vote me.” I will let you decide how stupid that statement is and how exactly they manipulate poor and helpless people. My point of this post is not to defend any of them. My point is, the more we argue the more chaos we make. It seems like everybody is on a mission to sound smarter than the next person, to be better than the next person. “My religion is better than yours,” “my race is better than yours” and I am tired of this. What do I earn from pointing out a stupid, irrelevant topic on a cute video of a cat playing. Why can we not enjoy things, but rather want to be the center of attention and point out, a completely different thing to compare. Why can I not listen to Taylor Swift but also have to argue how Beyonce is so much better in her album and much better celebrity. I mean she probably is but why is that relevant in Taylor’s music video? Why in a civil right’s post some white person gets offended for not having the center of attention? Why people compare Bible and Quran when Bible had the luxury to change with time and Quran didn’t? Why do I have to constantly prove how “american” I am when I am paying my way through college and you get to enjoy unemployment benefit, child benefit selling weed. I do not care how you make your money, but I would care if you blame me for your problem. If you blame me for risking your luxury.

Anyway enough of my rant. I do not want to end this post with such heavy words. I am just a little bit of sad because I cancelled my study abroad trip to Cambodia. It was a very hard decision. After careful consideration, I realized instead of spending so much money on a month of study abroad, I could take two summer classes that will reduce me one semester and it will free up my next summer when I will finally be able to travel somewhere and volunteer without the pressure of study.

The only cool thing I have done in this break is going to the trail of lights. I also came home to jilapis (also known as jalebi) and I used my last dining dollars on chocolate croissant.


Food Truck Friday


How are you doing? I just got back from “walk to end Alzheimer’s” and it was fun! Much needed positivity before I jump into midterms. I got my face painted for the first time, ate bbq taco from food truck and got lost few times. On wednesday I went to a laughter yoga in west austin and oh my god! how did I not know about this? So much fun!

I really really wanted to try some more mediterranean place so yesterday we looked up mediterranean food place on yelp and decided to try aimee’s super fantazmo. After we ordered our food my partner in crime pointed out at the cheesecake food truck and said “maybe they will have coffee flavored cheesecake!” I hope you know me well enough to understand any coffee dessert and me is kind of inseparable. I didn’t think there will be a coffee flavored cheesecake but out of three cheescake options one of them were mocha cheesecake (I KNOW!!!!!!) We had dessert before we had our dinner.

  We were still pretty hungry so when we got served our food, we jumped into it like a fat kid in mcDonalds. It was delicious. I couldn’t finish the mixed rice plate so I brought it home with me and had a second dinner. (what? you guys don’t have second dinners? you are cray cray!)

The pictures don’t do justice but there were so much food and so much protein. For the first time in my life I hoped for just a little bit less food so I could mix them together without dropping  food everywhere.

We then saw this ^^.

Tis the season to be basic is all I have to say. Anything pumpkin has gone basic for me (not pumpkin pie.) I expected guys in their skinny jeans and J crew sweater with perfectly placed beanie holding these but there weren’t that many people. I took one sip of it and it tasted plain nasty. Never liked alcohol anyway but others who did like it didn’t enjoy it either.
 This is an attempt to recreate buzzfeed’s BTS cake. It didn’t turn out to be as tasty… but again, nothing can be less tasty if you put oreos, cookie dough and brownie batter.


Quick, Easy and Delicious Breakfast


Breakfast became a luxury for me since I started school. I drag myself out of bed around 7 in the morning to go to work by 7:30. If I am fortunate enough to pull myself out of the bed right when my alarm goes off, I will go to the Einstein Bros to get me a morning coffee. I used to be a big fan of their blueberry bagel with honey almond spread but lately I am not craving it as much and if I am not craving something as much I don’t see the point of taking in extra calories. On my way back from work sometimes I will grab a breakfast burrito and go straight to class. After class I will get home and eat everything inside of the burrito and throw away the tortilla.

I recently purchased a microwavable egg maker. It’s similar to making egg in a mug. But this is absolutely adorable and keeps the inside very moist rather than drying it out and sticking to the inside wall. I had bought frozen fajita veggies last week and I decided to saute them in the pan to give a little crunch. Then I put  2 beaten eggs in the egg maker and the fajitas. Covered them and cooked for 1 minute and then again 30 seconds. It came out perfect.


Recently someone introduced me to french toast. Well I always knew they existed but never really wanted to try them. My first attempt was to cook them at home. I used Texas Toast and soaked them for a little longer so they came out mushy. I would rather have a mushy sweet bread than tasting plain bread but some might disagree and argue that’s not french toast. On sunday when I got back to my dorm from Austin I bought some very cheap round top bread from heb, eggs and a small vanilla mocha coffee creamer. I know you are supposed to use milk but trust me on this one. Then I did what you are supposed to do. Mix egg and creamer (or milk if you are boring) and dipped my bread into it and fried them. I forgot to grab a syrup or honey so I ended up eating it by itself. But it was already very sweet from the creamer, didn’t even need a syrup. I highly recommend you trying out french toast with creamer than milk. I haven’t tried it out with coconut creamer or soy creamer so can’t tell you anything about them but if you decide to try, let me know!


So there you have it my fancy easy and quick breakfast that I will most likely be eating during 7pm instead of 7am.


Am I independent yet?

12030871_926264830752390_1273780131_nI wanted to become independent for a very long time. It all started when I wanted to go out to play at 3pm outside and my mom locked the door and little me couldn’t reach it, when I really really wanted to buy some candy but my mom wouldn’t let me get it, when I really wanted to buy that decorative vase and my dad said it’s unnecessary. Few years ago when I finally started to getting my paychecks to my own bank account I thought I was independent. I thought I can handle it all, after all I have been preparing for last 10 or so years. But I confused myself. Independent is when you have the option to choose and you make a reasonable decision not being able to afford everything you want because you will never have them all. Our want never ends.

In my past relationship, I thought I was very independent and responsible but actually I was dependent on him to make the right decisions. I forced all my energy into making him understand the value of making good decision, value of whatever the hell I liked. My happiness dependent on his wish and choices. Now there can be pages and pages about how two people need to come together to keep each other happy but regardless we need to be able to tweak the picture of the future we imagine to fit our situation. Not trying our best to keep it as original because I will never be able to live my life traveling or shop in whole foods or try out all the food trucks here, but what I can do is be happy with going for a late night walk by myself or with someone, feel comfortable walking into a food place and not order it “to go”.

I am at that part of my life where things are just how they are. I don’t jump up and down with over excitement or cry out loud for something I had been waiting for. I finally realized that there’s no point of blaming everybody else for my sorrow when I am the one isn’t happy with myself. I am not depressed at all, but I kept looking for excuses that prevented me from being happy while I could  just forget about them and try to find what makes me happy. I don’t need to be right in everyone’s eyes, I don’t need to let them know how I don’t agree with their view points and I certainly don’t need to be upset over someone’s comment when I know it’s not true. I don’t need to justify my stand to anyone and if I do need to justify my position or proof why I am allowing myself to think that way then I probably shouldn’t even be with them for any reason. I want to be independent.

If you are confused by this totally random post then know, they are just thoughts. I am pretty content with my life at this point. I talk to my mom every day and tell her how my day is going, I force Trevor to take me out to get some bubble tea, I look up things to get for my future apartment. I think about traveling somewhere and maybe move outside of United States. I just needed to make sure I take a step back and rethink the way I view life.

If you are struggling with negativity around you or maybe just a little upset or even tired of things happening around you, know that it’s not you responsibility to fix it. The only responsibility you have is to keep yourself happy and take care of your love. Don’t overwhelm yourself by giving all of you to the people you love (parents, significant others, kids) They will be happy when they see you are happy. You unknowingly transfer your worries to the people you love when you stress out. It’s okay to feel lost and not satisfy every single need. Your happiness only depends on you.



The only few times in my life I admit that I made mistakes, this week was one of them and I would love to pass on that advice to anyone who is willing to hear. Most likely I know any sensible person would already know that but here it goes “Do not set up your tent when it’s raining.”  

  I am glad that we invested on a tarp. Who knew out of all the days of summer the one day we reserved for camping is going to be full of pouring rain. Speaking of which I suggest reserving your campsite in advance. You can do it online and pay it online if you are going to a state park. We got a pretty good camping site. Very close to the restroom and shower but not so close that you see everyone going in and out. We had good privacy.  For tent, we picked a 4 person tent. Seriously! When buying tent make sure to think of it as you are buying for double the amount of people. We had comfortable space for two people. I cannot imagine 4 people in there. I believe it’s called ozturk instant dome 4 person tent. I am quite happy with the purchase. The tent was super easy to set up. Less than 3 minutes. For sleeping we got a twin sized air bed mattress. Even though it says on tent packaging that a queen size mattress would fit. The tent door is very tiny for that. And there wouldn’t be any moving space at all. We made the mistakes of getting an electric pumped one. We ran and bought ac inverter to pump the mattress from car. We also didn’t try to pump it at home before using it. It’s advised that you pump your mattress for few hours before using it. It was still comfortable but sleeping bag  would probably have done the job. We also got a cheap camp light with fan and I am so glad that I did. Even with the raining and cool weather it definitely does get warm inside the tent and the very little airflow the fan provided was a life saver. We realized when the batteries went out around 4 am. It was our fault for not packing extra batteries. So pack extra batteries folks. Pack light. I brought 3 books and ton of food and other stuff. Get a freezer bag with travel size mouthwash, soap, powder (help you with sweat), shampoo and conditioner if you are thinking about staying for few days, lotion, hand towels and baby wipes. I kept the baby wipes in cooler so it felt like heaven in humidity. Speaking of which get a small cooler to keep water. We bought 24 pack water to wash our face and drinking. Bring extra pair of clothes and swimsuits, towels and a book. There’s nothing wrong with getting granola bars and take out food 


Even though we had brought cooking stove and stuff, we couldn’t resist take out bbq.

Thankfully we had an extra towel to lay it inside the tent so we were able to wipe our feet coming in. We didn’t have to if I waited for the rain to stop to set the tent.    
Have plenty of plastic bags to store dirty clothes and trash. Paper towels and flashlight is good idea. I also recommend having extra roll of toilet paper just incase. I have to say I was very pleased with how well taken care was the park. No horror in the toilet stalls. We saw park rangers all the time. For cooking I brough camping pots and pans, stove with butane.  


We also had pancake mix (add water and pour kind) however we totally forgot oil. The pans were not nonsticky. So we settled for canned steak and potatoes. It was good.  

If you plan on going out for stroll or paranoid about someone stealing your stuff. Invest in a very tiny locks to lock the zipper. If anybody wants to steal anything from your tent they might as well just use a knife to cut through it and you shouldn’t be taking expensive stuff to camping anyway, but it does give you peace of mind.

It was a pleasant experience over all. And I am going to do it again 🙂 hopefully all around United States someday!! 


Gardening Log 3

Hello there!

If you are reading this post first of all thank you! I am not quite a fascinating writer and my posts were meant to be about my personal life. I am getting more visitors than usual in my blog and so I felt I should be more formal. Anyway! it’s been a while since I updated my garden log. Mostly because I haven’t been to San Marcos and clay is a bit lazy when it comes to taking pictures. Sadly few of my plants died before I could even see them. I blame you texas weather!

This is the cucumber plant we planted recently. We got the miracle gro seed pods and it’s going great so far.



IMG_3257It took Forrrreeeeevverrrrr for my cilantros to see the sunshine, just like hulu’s commercial but once they did, they are growing like crazy.



So proud of them! My marigolds are doing great! I will be honest, I didn’t think they will grow so I planted them close to each other which I regret a bit now. But we learn from our mistakes!







IMG_3424By the time you read this post the flowers already bloomed/ But clayton is in corpus at this moment, so it will take a day or two to get the pictures. I waited about 3-4 weeks to write this post and didn’t want to wait any longer so as soon I get them I will update them here and retitle the post as updated.




Palm radishes grew finally! I am so happy! (yep, things like that get me very excited hence the extreme amount of exclamation points taking over my life, sentences mostly)


IMG_3394And there are my okras!


I am feeling a bit stupid as I have no idea what those plants are :[

IMG_3428And this is the venus fly trap in clayton’s mario mug that I got him for his birthday last year!



IMG_3422I promise I will update asap if i see any changes. My lettuces didn’t survive the 4 days of unbearable heat in texas. They have my condolences.

But today after I got off of work I found these pretty things in the corner.


They were actually 2.99$. It was a nice little surprise at the checkstand.


I picked up two of them but few flowers came off… That made me sad…


Just incase you wanted to know what kind is that.


I ran to target to get some pots and soils, and another pleasant surprise! The pots that we bought for $3.49 last time were on clearance. (I know it says 2.49 was the last price, they might have lowered the price after we bought them)

IMG_3549They are so beautiful! Looking at them feels like disney musical.


My mom asked me to put them right next to her pepper plant. That somehow reminds me of beauty and the beast.

That was my garden log. I hope one day I will look back to these posts and laugh at my amatuer self. Hopefully by that time I will have a nice little (or big) garden.

Gardening log 1 ||| Gardening log 2 |||


Get Yourself Some Happiness #2


In texas we are experiencing something very unusual. Constant rain. You may have heard the saying, “if you don’t like the weather of texas, wait a few days and it will change” but this constant rain is a bit of painful for the texans. My heart goes out to people who has lost houses, valuable, friends and family in this flood. Stay Strong!

That being said I decided to book something fun to look forward to. I booked a package for cancun! Although it’s not until the spring break of 2016 but that gives me plenty of time to save up.

Also I received my “happy mail” from A Beautiful Mess. I wrote a post on my first package here. This time around I got some pretty fun stuff that I can’t wait to use and some that I don’t really care for.

1The packaging is still same and pretty.

2I love the amount of glitter they put on their products but my lighting today wasn’t cooperating. This is a beautiful card to pass on to your coworkers desk when they are not looking or if you are like me, I am probably going to put it on my board right behind my laptop.

3This postcard says it all without being too fancy. Sometimes it’s just way too formal and cheesy to send friends postcard that says “thinking about you” or “wishing you were here”

4Can’t get enough of these emoji stickers. There are so many ways to use them.. I am pretty obsessed with emojis and thinking about getting some emoji throw pillows for my dorm and this just seems perfect.

5For all the grads out there.

6This is one of my favorites. Inside it says “but I still love you” great for all those sassy couples.

7You get it right?

9Simple and pretty.

10This one looks like a science teacher’s card for her favorite student. Inside it says “you are my favorite.” May not be very appropriate.

11You are cute as buttons. I would probably write a letter on it using sharpie to give a personal touch.

12These stickers are the highlights of my week. I can’t wait to fix my polaroid and put these tiny stickers on the pictures.

13So there ya go! This month’s happy mails. You can find better pictures by going into their website. I am thinking about getting a chest to store all my stationeries. If you have any cool idea to store them somewhere fun, let me know comment below!